Washington Redskins Ease Tensions With Native Americans By Adding Bottle Of Booze To Logo
WASHINGTON—Hoping to alleviate the controversy surrounding their allegedly racist name, representatives for the Washington Redskins announced Thursday that they will attempt to ease tensions with the nation’s outraged Native Americans by adding a bottle of liquor to the football team’s official logo. “We have heard the complaints from the Native American community about our logo, and we are making some key design changes so that we can at last put this matter behind us,” franchise owner Dan Snyder told reporters at a press conference in which he unveiled the newest iteration of the team’s emblem, which now features a 1.75-liter plastic jug of Black Velvet blended whiskey alongside the Redskins’ traditional Indian head profile. “After years of contentious back-and-forth over the issue, we decided to come up with a logo that at last pays fitting tribute to this country’s proud native peoples. And we believe this is that logo. You redskins like-um the firewater, right?” According to team sources, in a further attempt to mend relations with the Native American community, the Redskins have elected to donate thousands of smallpox-infested blankets to the nation’s Indian reservations.

Washington Redskins Ease Tensions With Native Americans By Adding Bottle Of Booze To Logo

WASHINGTON—Hoping to alleviate the controversy surrounding their allegedly racist name, representatives for the Washington Redskins announced Thursday that they will attempt to ease tensions with the nation’s outraged Native Americans by adding a bottle of liquor to the football team’s official logo. “We have heard the complaints from the Native American community about our logo, and we are making some key design changes so that we can at last put this matter behind us,” franchise owner Dan Snyder told reporters at a press conference in which he unveiled the newest iteration of the team’s emblem, which now features a 1.75-liter plastic jug of Black Velvet blended whiskey alongside the Redskins’ traditional Indian head profile. “After years of contentious back-and-forth over the issue, we decided to come up with a logo that at last pays fitting tribute to this country’s proud native peoples. And we believe this is that logo. You redskins like-um the firewater, right?” According to team sources, in a further attempt to mend relations with the Native American community, the Redskins have elected to donate thousands of smallpox-infested blankets to the nation’s Indian reservations.

gotemcoach:

THE WHITE RAJON RONDO
A guy/celebrity by the name of Christopher French (he’s dating Ashley Tisdale) looks so much like White Rajon Rondo I’m debating calling the authorities.
I believe so strongly this man could actually be the white version of Boston’s point guard that I’ve already got a trademark on the phrase “Caucajon Rondo™.”
#GotEmCoach

gotemcoach:

THE WHITE RAJON RONDO

A guy/celebrity by the name of Christopher French (he’s dating Ashley Tisdale) looks so much like White Rajon Rondo I’m debating calling the authorities.

I believe so strongly this man could actually be the white version of Boston’s point guard that I’ve already got a trademark on the phrase “Caucajon Rondo™.”

#GotEmCoach

OSN shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in this weekend’s NFL week 12 games:
Saints at Falcons
OSN’s Lock Of The Week: Saints – Drew Brees will throw for 19 touchdowns in a 17-13 Saints win.
Jets at Ravens
OSN’s Pick: Jets – Geno Smith will need to come in and just manage this game while the Jets continue to patiently wait for the return of Mark Sanchez.
Steelers at Browns
OSN’s Pick: Steelers or Browns – Win or lose, these teams need to run the ball as much as possible to eat the clock and get this godforsaken game over with as fast as fucking possible.
Panthers at Dolphins
OSN’s Pick: Panthers – This game is a matchup between a quality defense and a quality offense and the Dolphins.
Bears at Rams
OSN’s Pick: Bears – Don’t be surprised if at some point the St. Louis crowd starts chanting for Brady Quinn to kill himself.
Buccaneers at Lions
OSN’s Pick: Lions – Detroit will hand Tampa Bay their first loss of the week.
Vikings at Packers
OSN’s Pick: Packers – Running back Adrian Peterson is on pace to shatter Barry Sanders’ NFL record for most talent wasted on a horrible team.
Jaguars at Texans
OSN’s Pick: Texans – Andre Johnson will find it easy to get separation when storming out of the offensive huddle toward the sideline.
Chargers at Chiefs
OSN’s Pick: Chiefs – Following their first loss, the Chiefs will return to what they do best: beating terrible teams at home.
Colts at Cardinals
OSN’s Pick: Cardinals – The Colts will be looking to come out of this game with a win. The Cardinals, meanwhile, will be trying to get a victory of their own—but then again, so will the Colts, so it’s quite complicated.
Titans at Raiders
OSN’s Pick: Titans – The big question is, which Titans offense will show up against the Raiders: the one that ran all over the Rams three weeks ago, or the 2003 roster led by Steve McNair and Eddie George?
Cowboys at Giants
OSN’s Pick: Cowboys – Surely it is some kind of cruel joke that we only get to see one of these teams win.
Broncos at Patriots
OSN’s Pick: Broncos – A concussed Wes Welker will certainly make a levelheaded and emotionally detached decision about playing in this game.
49ers at Redskins
OSN’s Pick: Redskins – The 49ers will still be struggling to adjust to the new NFL rule that forbids physical contact with a quarterback during sacks.

OSN shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in this weekend’s NFL week 12 games:

Saints at Falcons

OSN’s Lock Of The Week: Saints – Drew Brees will throw for 19 touchdowns in a 17-13 Saints win.

Jets at Ravens

OSN’s Pick: Jets – Geno Smith will need to come in and just manage this game while the Jets continue to patiently wait for the return of Mark Sanchez.

Steelers at Browns

OSN’s Pick: Steelers or Browns – Win or lose, these teams need to run the ball as much as possible to eat the clock and get this godforsaken game over with as fast as fucking possible.

Panthers at Dolphins

OSN’s Pick: Panthers – This game is a matchup between a quality defense and a quality offense and the Dolphins.

Bears at Rams

OSN’s Pick: Bears – Don’t be surprised if at some point the St. Louis crowd starts chanting for Brady Quinn to kill himself.

Buccaneers at Lions

OSN’s Pick: Lions – Detroit will hand Tampa Bay their first loss of the week.

Vikings at Packers

OSN’s Pick: Packers – Running back Adrian Peterson is on pace to shatter Barry Sanders’ NFL record for most talent wasted on a horrible team.

Jaguars at Texans

OSN’s Pick: Texans – Andre Johnson will find it easy to get separation when storming out of the offensive huddle toward the sideline.

Chargers at Chiefs

OSN’s Pick: Chiefs – Following their first loss, the Chiefs will return to what they do best: beating terrible teams at home.

Colts at Cardinals

OSN’s Pick: Cardinals – The Colts will be looking to come out of this game with a win. The Cardinals, meanwhile, will be trying to get a victory of their own—but then again, so will the Colts, so it’s quite complicated.

Titans at Raiders

OSN’s Pick: Titans – The big question is, which Titans offense will show up against the Raiders: the one that ran all over the Rams three weeks ago, or the 2003 roster led by Steve McNair and Eddie George?

Cowboys at Giants

OSN’s Pick: Cowboys – Surely it is some kind of cruel joke that we only get to see one of these teams win.

Broncos at Patriots

OSN’s Pick: Broncos – A concussed Wes Welker will certainly make a levelheaded and emotionally detached decision about playing in this game.

49ers at Redskins

OSN’s Pick: Redskins – The 49ers will still be struggling to adjust to the new NFL rule that forbids physical contact with a quarterback during sacks.

sportsnetny:

Not only is the Yankee front office itching to know how much of that salary they’ll be free from next season, they’re dying to know WHEN they’re going to know about it.  The hearing itself should take at least a few days, and a final decision from arbitrator Fredric Horowitz could take months after that.  Free agency starts 6 days after the completion of the World Series, which could be anytime in the first 2 weeks of November depending on how long that series goes.  The sooner the Yankees know the decision on A-Rod, the sooner they can get started on all their offseason plans. 

Rodriguez begins appeal of 211-game ban

sportsnetny:

Not only is the Yankee front office itching to know how much of that salary they’ll be free from next season, they’re dying to know WHEN they’re going to know about it.  The hearing itself should take at least a few days, and a final decision from arbitrator Fredric Horowitz could take months after that.  Free agency starts 6 days after the completion of the World Series, which could be anytime in the first 2 weeks of November depending on how long that series goes.  The sooner the Yankees know the decision on A-Rod, the sooner they can get started on all their offseason plans. 

image

Rodriguez begins appeal of 211-game ban